Saturday, October 11, 2008

Eavesdropping

Post your eavesdropping news stories here as comments.

18 comments:

Kortney Sorensen said...

In this week’s edition, Opposites Don’t Always Attract, I discovered two completely opposite girls at the university. Samantha Gully who is widely known as the number one Holy Roller never leaves her house without some type of cross. We all know it’s evident that she is into the right thing. “I believe there are more important things then going out and getting wasted,” Samantha expressed. She always talks about Church camp where she found her soul and direction in life. She explained to me that she did confide in her thirty year old married counselor. Anyone who is anyone knows that she and her counselor are having more than deep conversations.
On the opposite side, Mary Green, a tall, blonde bimbo revolves her outfits around her endless supply of stilettos. She thinks that by fucking her way to the top she will become a great actress. “Like” is about the extent of her vocabulary and she has no background of education. I overheard her saying that she had an audition, but her ass of a mother made her miss it. “She [mother] complained that I had class, so I had to once again call my agent and cancel,” Mary whined. Believe me; she’ll “talk” to someone about getting another audition.
I’d say that the only thing they have in common is their suspicious sexual conduct. Not in this world or the next will these two girls cross paths or share a friendly hello. Never say anything you do not want people to know because I will always be around the corner listening for the great gossip that makes you cringe.
Until next time, xoxo
Gossip girl

Brittany Haynes said...

Gossip Column
This just in Laura is now known as the biggest slut on campus. She has made the worst reputation for herself. Now she is going to have to live with knowing that everyone on campus knows she is a slut. She might learn this semester that acting in such ways will not get her anywhere. If she doesn’t learn soon she is going to have a rough college life ahead of her. There are many things for her to learn and I am sure she will have to learn them all the hard way. Ladies need to start taking their friend’s advice when given to them.

I hope this column helps all the sluts on campus realize that they all need to stop making bad names for themselves and start being respectable ladies. Many of us are tired of hearing them complain about the rumors and things going around about them. Maybe if they would chill out a little then there wouldn’t be so much stuff being said about them. Ladies you know if you get with a guy he is going to tell all of his friends and his friends are going to tell all of their friends. Next thing you know everyone knows about that one night with that one guy that meant nothing. If ladies keep up with this nonsense we are going to have a lot more problems on campus. So ladies just remember to be respected starts with you respecting yourself.

GeraldSoder said...

Gerald’s Gossip was on the scene last night, and luckily we got wrapped up in a heap of scandal and controversy. Gossip team reporters caught an interesting social rendezvous between Baton Rouge’s hottest temptress, the dazzling Kate Hillfire, and her charming new boy toy, Dillon Blake Izzo. The two reportedly spent a romantic evening sharing deep personal thoughts and cocktails at a local hip apartment complex near LSU campus. The Gossip team snuck in close and got all the juicy details.
Apparently Kate knows her politics and isn’t afraid to express her opinion. “I absolutely hate Sarah Paulin, she has no experience.” How controversial, you go girl! Meanwhile, the badboy Dillon Blake had this to say. “Who the shit is Sarah Paulin?” Uh Oh! Somebody has spent a little too much time spending daddy’s money and not enough time following world events. The daring Blake is son to B.R.’s most notorious billionaire entrepreneur Ronnie Izzo, the creator of the world famous Izzo’s Illegal Burrito. Apparently Blake was more interested in drinking the night away and ordered several bottles of Cristal Champaign. “I have to study for micro and I’m too drunk already.” Not even LSU can hold back this rebel without a budget.
The two carried on conversation into the night, and Kate revealed a shocking story of scandal and danger. Gerald’s Gossip was luckily able to bring you all the details of this treacherous tale. The night before, at a sheik and ritzy barbeque, Kate and many of her upscale acquaintances were held up at gunpoint by an unknown masked assailant. The masked thug took wallets and IPods containing the personal music taste of many of B.R.’s top social ring. The gunman ran away minutes before authorities arrived on the scene. No one was hurt in the incident, but Kate had this to say. “My purse was right next to me, and it was Guggi, he didn’t even know he just took iPods.” Thank god honey, our readers would be lost without that fashion sense of yours. A concerned Dillon had this to say. “I don’t know what I would do in that situation; I wish I was there and carrying a gun I would have been like what bitch!” Apparently the outlaw has a soft side; he just might be a keeper. Later the two lovebirds were seen leaving the complex around midnight in Dillon’s hot red Ferrari, to an undisclosed location. The gossip team trailed behind in our stealthy stakeout van, and you will have to wait until next time for the shocking end result. Thanks for reading and god bless gossip.
Sincerely Gerald Gossip.

kevin.tran said...

Gossip weekly

Turns out what would be a regular night of dinner at a local sushi restaurant, Tsunami, would turn into a night full of questionable matters. Freshmen Magon and Brook were met up by two friends, Caty and Catherine. Soon after, boys from what appeared to be "stalkers" from their Biology lab showed up and sat near the crowd.


A new form of entertainment known as "pregaming" was introduced to these girls, and the guys soon after asked for an exchange of numbers.
The guys reportedly asked the girl's to come back to their dorms to drink before hand, and head out
to Reggies afterwards.


Back at the dorm, both Magon and Brook were last seen heading to the twelfth floor of the parking garage with the guys that lived there. Speculations point to sexual activity judging by the amount of time spent up there. Questions about this are still being determined


Meanwhile, back inside the dorm room Brittany and Caty end up not going out to Reggies and call it a night. Thanks alot Magon and Brook. Way to ruin a girl's night out.

Cassie said...

Gossip time. Who says blondes have all the fun? This week brunette Hollie Sommers was spotted bar hoping downtown, causing a wild scene. This wild scene invovled binge drinking complete with a massive hangover. "I totally cant tell you what I did last night. It was horrible." Hollie commented the morning after to blonde Riley Ridge. Hollie was nursing what seemed like a killer hangover and the smell of alcholol seemed to pour off of her. Sorry its not that hard to guess what you did Hollie, but points for trying. Good girl Riley was reportedly studying in her dorm all night. And didnt seem to care what Hollie did last night at all. These two surely put an end to the common notion that blondes have more fun.
Bad girl Hollie did not stop at binge drinking: no she had to add complete stupidity to the list. "I cant believe I left my stupid phone at the bar last night , I was not even that drunk." She comments to riley slurring her words. Half the classroom can hear her as she reports on her wild engagement with a strange boy. No report yet as to who this tall dark and yummy boy might be, but my resources say that wild Hollie did not go home with him. She just had a little fun at the bar itself. Good for you girl; thats the way to play it safe. Hey at least there was no drunk dialing going on.
Here is the kicker. After spending all night bar hoping, binge drinking, and hooking up with strange yummy boys, Hollie still managed even more stupidity. Good girl Riley reportedly gave this hometown brunette a good piece of advice. "I would just call the bar and ask if they found your phone. And dont call your cell too much otherwise it will die." Ding ding ding. What an idea! Too bad Hollie might not be able to remember which bar her precious phone is in. Maybe its the yummy boy bar Hollie; Im sure you were preocupid.
Til tomorrow Gossip lovers, lets just hope that your not the one being reported on.

Perfect Paul said...

College Problems
From the moment you walk across the stage at graduation you are already thinking of how great the college experience will be. For the girls, they are probably thankful that high school is finished and all of its drama and problems are over. They go to college with a positive outlook ready to start fresh and make a good impression on their new alma mater. While some may succeed and enjoy their first year at college many will fall back to past ways and problems. The case of Stephanie Marie sums up the life of the unfortunate freshman girl.

Stephanie is your normal, everyday girl who just likes to enjoy life. Sometimes this comes as a problem to her because she has not let go of everything back home. During a 10 min conversation with her girlfriend she was quoted saying, “Ok I don’t understand how you call someone and they don’t call you back.” Skeptics believe that the guy Stephanie called was her high school sweetheart. When asked about how she felt about being ignored she replied with and unusual answer, “I mean I don’t care, but it’s pissing me off.” It seems that Stephanie has yet to let go of the past and is still wishing that she was back in the arms of her former sweetheart. The worst part is that she is trying to convince herself that she really doesn’t care. Stephanie was reported talking to another guy that was quoted being “really nice” which, turns out, was not the case. Stephanie had asked this unknown jerk to lunch and was stood leaving her in confusion and turmoil.
If the whole boy situation wasn’t enough, Stephanie never let go of her klutz ways, not to mention she is very unlucky. It was a normal Wednesday morning and everything seemed to be going right for Stephanie. This perfect day would not last long because when she got to class and sat down she came to discover that her seat was wet. This was followed by the sound of ripping cloth. This was enough to cause Stephanie to run out the classroom wet and with torn pants. She was later quoted moaning, “Why do these things always happen to me… it’s just not fair.” And not fair is exactly what it seems too many.
A good student is something Stephanie could proudly say was. She had been an A, B student all her life and did not expect for things to change in college. It was expected that something would happen to Stephanie and her academics. While taking her first math test a great tragedy occurred that would cause her to struggle on her test. Stephanie had just turned on her calculator when all of a sudden it died on died. Experts say that the cause was two faulty batteries but most believe that lady luck is not on Stephanie’s side.
Believe the Experts or the skeptics but whichever you believe just know that Stephanie’s freshman year seems to be reminding too much of high school. To all girls experiencing these types of problems seek out help with your parents, friends, or even your college counselors. Don’t give up and one day you will just look back and laugh at what you went through and know that you are not the only one.

Caroline14 said...

In this week's edition of, Leave your High School in Your Hometown, it was discovered that once again a set of friends from the same high school have mixed and reportedly "hooked up".
As I was sipping on a delicious Caramel Mochasippi at CC's this past Monday evening, two ladies came and sat very near to me to discuss last night's events. Sarah Wilson who is a known conservative, started the conversation with a shocking comment, "Tate Rusche, I can't believe you would hook up with Beaux!" I knew from that second that this was going to be a good one. This Tate Rusche was reported to have "hooked up" with THE Beaux Jackson the previous night. Not only did they hook up, but they "hooked up while you were sitting on my lap tate!" commented Sarah Wilson. After a few minutes, it was discovered that the two who had hooked up were from the same home town and they actually grew up together! To think that after being around one person your whole life, knowing who and how they are, when you go to college, it's like you completely forget who that person is. According to Sarah, "Beaux is such a dork!" which makes this even more interesting. This news is even more known for the fact that not only is Beaux a dork, but he actually ditched beautiful and popular Tate to go to the LSU game with someone else. "He found another date Sarah! After asking me the other night, he texted me last night to tell me he found someone else to go with." This is such a mess, it just goes to show that when going to college, you should leave your high school and all of that drama behind you and start a new with your life! In next week's edition, find out exactly who Beaux ditched Tate for, after reported to me that it was some "Tri Delt whore."
Thank you for your time and remember Leave your high school in your hometown.
See ya!

jitchmohn said...

This week in Talk with Mitch we find out Burn After Reading was a really crazy movie. According to the account of two teenagers under the influence of an unknown substance " It was fucking crazy", and "there was so many twist and turns it blew my mind". In order to not give away the movie i will limit what i actually heard from these two students. But apparently whatever you think will happen, it doesn't. It was a very good and very crazy movie that was a joy to watch.
On other news, Chief could be quitting his job at Ground Patti. According to Chief, a 20 year old college student, his job at Ground Patti "blows". According to Chief, he once found a roach in a customers chicken salad and felt bad so was forced to turn around, once halfway at the table, and make the customer a new salad. Chief says he is tired of working so late and working in the hot kitchen and is ready to quit.
And on the last note, eye drops. It was a group consensus on Saturday night that Roto V's are, hands down, the best eye drops. Once one gets past the burning sensation, it is an experience that everyone should feel at least once in their life. But beware the Silvers burn far more than the regular old Blues and Greens.

zach rhodes said...

With the election growing closer to an end, activist on both sides have started to challenge the American people to step up and vote for some one who represents the values that they live for. With Barack Obama contending to be the first African American president many racial groups have put it upon themselves to make a stand for the candidate in which they support. Many verbal arguments have broken out all over the country between the Black Panthers and the KKK. During a press conference in Little Rock Arkansas, the head of the KKK challenged his audience, by making statements that include, “and yall are suppose to be country boys?” Many of his remarks ended with the statement “White Power.” At one point during the conference Ross Lera, the head of the KKK, pointed out the Confederate flag and stated, “look at that flag, HELL YEAH!” The Black Panthers did not waste time firering back. The head of the Black Panthers Houston Gulman stated, “You are going to hell!” And “That is not nice.” Houston’s response to the verbal out lashing was short, sweet, and strong worded. Many more are these incidents are sure to insue.

zfickes said...

Hello readers this just in, apparently Saturday night during the game LSU student Chris Dautreve was seen sneaking up to his apartment with a "skeez" as it was put my his friends. Chris met the anonymous girl after a night of heavy drinking in attempts to drown his sorrows after LSU's devastating loss. The two were seen holding hands and stumbling as they gradually made their way up the stairs. One of his friends commented that "the girl looked like a horse." Chris fumbling for an excuse pulled out the sorry excuse "dude it was dark I couldn't even tell what she looked like." However, it seemed his friends weren't buying that lie and they continued to make fun of him. One of his friends seemingly intrigued asked the details, which because of vulgarity I will spare you. I will tell you that it wasn't a pretty scene when he woke up the following morning with the "horse" in his bed.e

Evan Riley said...

The ratings are in and LSU party life seems to prove to be higher ranked than Southern Mississippi. Two LSU students were discusing a personal experience of the Southern Miss party life and it was very dissappointing. One student was exclaiming, "a dry campus! You have no idea what that is like, people don't tailgate, the campus is just dead leading up until the football game's kickoff." It seems like this student was spoiled by the transformation of LSU's campus into a fighting tiger party zone. Other differences noticed among the LSU student, were that at Southern Miss you are only allowed 2 guests per dorm room and they must be checked in and cannot be left anywhere in the dorm without the supervision of the person who lives there. Also, no guest is allowed to sleep over in a dorm, unlike the housing situation at LSU. When it all comes down to the end, the students have spoken. Alcohol just makes for a good party and a little freedom and privacy never hurt anyone either.

Phillip Westbrook said...

Should the website juicy campus exist? Many would agree that it is harmless. But students also talk about how degrading and upsetting it can be. Juicy campus is the place to get the low down on college campuses all across America. Anything you want to know can be found on this teen website. Anyone can say anything they want about anybody. Some students argue freedom of speech. But others say it is hurtful and embarrassing. More than likely any information found on someone from juicy campus would be degrading and cause conflict among teens. No one knows what the future may hold for this controversial website...

Colin said...

Political gossip
Once again Evan Robinson and Jillian Leblanc were caught having lunch at Highland Dining Hall. Evan wearing Blue Jeans and a button down, Jillian wearing a shirt and a low cut tank top. We cannot tell you if they are official yet but what we can tell you if that there supporting Barack. Yay!!! The couple took shots at the Republican running mates calling all Conservatives uneducated. Evan also went on to sarcastically that the can be uneducated cause they have an American hero for a candidate. Evan went on to say jokingly that he would cross party lines because Sarah Palin looks so damn good saying, the he’d “Smash” her. Jillian thoughts of Palin were the thoughts of many people. She’s a “BITCH”.
The couple changed the subject as a 3rd wheel girl named Megan asked to sit by them. They began discussing a not so touchy subject: How Evan hates Mary. Jillian stopped by Mary’s the night before, before going to Reggie’s. Evan did not attend because every time Mary opens her mouth he wants to “shoot himself.” Don’t kill yourself Evan.

Taylor Moncrief said...

As I walked around downtown in Lafayette, Louisiana, I realized how many people spend their weekends going out and partying. I'm 25 years old and just got stood up at CC's. I'm not much of the partying type, so being downtown is very rare for me. As I kept walking around, sulking in my sorrows, I decided to try out a bar. I chose the closest one near me, Stans. The bouncer at the door didn't even card me, that's sad and pathetic. I wandered around, constantly being bumped into by ignorant, teenage drunks. I saw a few guys with t-shirts on from North Vermillion. They sure were a long way from home. I walked to the bar to order a water and right next to me were a couple making out, knocking over everything in site! If their parents only knew...I noticed one girl, nervously looking around while talking to one guy. She probably got stood up by her date too. I walked upstairs to the 'club' area and immediately was blinded by smoke. I felt my way around and finally caught onto the stage. I looked up only to see a group of girls shaking their stuff for all of Stans to see. I reached a window overlooking the first floor entrance and the line of people trying to get in was wrapped around the builing! In a matter of minutes, a whole bus load of people were dropped off. I'm guessing they were from a sorority party, unless I'm too outdated to know that people dress up as Harry Potter characters now for no reason. This was too much for me to handle and I was getting chlostrophobic. I made my way back through the smoke and once I reached the stairwell I overheard a young girl telling her friends how excited she was to be out for the first time since she had her baby! I did a double take as I passed by! That was it, I told myself right then and there that I would never leave my house again.

joel j said...

Another fight was reported last night taking place outside a bar called Reggies in Baton Rouge. The fight occurred late in the night and one kid was seriously injured. Fights are an often occurrence and Reggies and are said to occur almost every night. Some students report that there have been fights at Reggies every time they go. The fights tend to come from the drunken, crowded conditions that are present at Reggies. Many of the people in the fights have reported that the reason for them fighting was simply someone running into or spilling their drink on them. It is also said that the fights will continue to occur until the police can find a way to control it.

rebecca paz said...

Gossip Column
In last week's issue we took a poll asking women: "would you ever take your lover back if he admitted to cheating on you?"
Not surprisingly, most women agreed that they would not give their man a second chance. A mere 15%, however, diagreed. We wanted to dig deeper into the minds of our voters and readers, so we did a little under cover research.

"All guys are the same," argues Jessica Raiford. "If you dont give it up, he'll find someone who will!" says Jessica Raiford, sitting outside of South Hall. Stephanie Zeisloft and Shannon Maitreme, both friends of Jessica, use an example from the hit film, Sex and the City the Movie, to relate. In the movie, Miranda, a hard working mom devoted to her job and kids, puts aside her sex life for business and other matters. As result, Miranda's husband seeks pleasure elsewhere and sleeps with another woman. "Every girl will agree that that cheating is completely unacceptable under any circumstance, I could never forgive him." says Jessica. However, Stephanie disagreed, "Cheating may not be okay, but in situations like that, it is understandable." I think that all women will agree that cheating is wrong especially in marriage but for the few women that are that forgiving, we commend you. But really boys, In any circumstance cheating is not the answer; if you're not getting the affection you need, try talking to you're partner, don't do anything that might jeopradize your relationship. Because according to our polls, 85% of women will not take you back.

Brittaney Hebert said...

Blonde haired beauty, Sally Walkins was chatting away as she was last spotted at CC’s coffee shop on the intersection of Perkins and Bluebonnet in Baton Rouge, LA. Speaking in direct, straight-forward language she was “about to lose her lit” and ask everyone in the office “what the flip they were doing” as her unapproval of the office quota time not being met concerned her. Her deep conversation caused her arms to fly and spill all of her mocha black latte’ all over the floor.That’s a big no no if your just any girl hanging out for some caffeine, but Sally Walkins is the only bossy exception. Not caring in the slightest bit, America’s heartbreaking madame continued stating her feelings on the “job that’s pure shit”. She is the head of an insurance company that is Farm Bureau’s strongest competitor. Talking on the phone to Mr. Miller,head of the google website and multi-million dollar entrepreneur, she assured him of his truck’s liability for repair because of it’s model year, as she tried not to use so much work lingo to show off. Even though, we all know that she does know it ALL. Although she was having computer problems, that didn’t stop her as she quickly searched all the informative aspects of the crash results and appraisals of repair. Mr. Miller thanked her, and yet again blondie saves the day!

Corday Barnes said...

While waiting for the bus to bring me to my apartment complex, I decided to ease drop on two persons conversation. They were a young white male and female that were LSU students. They began talking about volleyball, especially comparing beach volleyball to court volleyball. The young man stated that he preferred court volleyball; while, the girl preferred beach volleyball. After, they started comparing jumping on the hard court to jumping in the sand. Then suddenly, the boy asked the girl if she wanted to go to the upcoming ball together or did she have a date. The girl was shocked and so was I. The young man came out of nowhere with that question. The girl said yea she has a date and she was actually waiting for that person to call her back to confirm he was coming. The young man’s facial expression was a look of disappointment. The young man replied by saying “well I think I’m just going to go by myself and play the field.” The girl told him she will see him later and walked away with her car keys in her hand.

I found this conversation to be very strange. I mean the young man just popped out of nowhere with the question asking the girl if she wanted to go to the upcoming ball with him. I know some of us men sometimes ask ourselves when we should ask a girl out; so, here is some advice. Lead up to the subject of asking a girl out. For example, in the young man’s situation, he should have asked the girl if she was going to ball first, then see if she had a date, finally ask her out. Maybe if he would have asked her those questions in that particular order, he wouldn’t have felt as bad getting rejected or he probably would have got the date. Who knows? I really think it was bad timing when and how he asked her out but at least he had enough courage to asked her out.